depends: cleanup package configure flags

Summary:

This PR adds additional configure flags to packages in depends to explicitly disable features we aren't using; similar to #16183. It also fixes passing --without-tools to qrencode.

Backport of core PR16370.

Depends on D5633.

Test Plan: Run the Gitian builds.

Reviewers: #bitcoin_abc, deadalnix

Reviewed By: #bitcoin_abc, deadalnix

Differential Revision: https://reviews.bitcoinabc.org/D5642