[backport#19489] test: Fail wait_until early if connection is lost

Summary:
faa9a74c9e99eb43ba0d27fa906767ee88011aeb test: Fail wait_until early if connection is lost (MarcoFalke)

Pull request description:

Calling `minonode.wait_until` needs a connection to make progress (e.g. waiting for an inv), unless the mininode waits for the initial connection or for a disconnection. So for test development and failure debugging, fail early in all `wait_until`, unless opted out.

Depends on D9514

Backport of core#19489

Test Plan:

ninja all check check-functional

Reviewers: #bitcoin_abc, PiRK

Reviewed By: #bitcoin_abc, PiRK

Differential Revision: https://reviews.bitcoinabc.org/D9515